The Death of Social Media
Spammer SEOs don’t kill social media, parents do.
In 2007, my mother joined MySpace.
I panicked and walked to Facebook.
In 2009, my mother joined Facebook. So did my mother-in-law, grandmother, stepmother and every random cousin I secretly hated since the second grade when that little shit said my freckles were dirty.
I panicked and ran to Twitter.
And then it happened. At 10:37pm EST on June 30, 2009, my in-laws asked if I was on Twitter, “Do you know that Andy Roddick’s on Twitter? You can follow him and see what he’s doing. It’s like your Facebook status update.”
I panicked and I sprinted to Tumblr.
Tumblr, please accept me into loving and obscure arms. May we last longer than Plurk, but never meet the parents.
